Omnivores (2013)

Seeing “Fangoria” was a bad sign.

And indeed, it’s a cheap exploitation flick.

More graphic and disturbing than ‘Emanuelle And The Last Cannibals’ but not as well written, acted, or directed.

Cannibalism, really bad fake sex, and Torgo’s grandson.

Actual length: 1:18

Grade: F-

Why ALL Bullying Is Bad – A Crash Course For The CI

NOTE: This is not an “anti-intellectual” post.

Intellectual is great.

Smug, arrogant, rude intellectual is NOT.

A lot of today’s crusading intellectuals seem to me – in an Einstein-ian “rebel against religious indoctrination” sense – to be compensating for the fact that they were picked on and made fun of in the not-too-distant past for being geeky, dorky, nerdy, and/or smart.

In the not-too-distant past when they were kids, that is, and being geeky/dorky/nerdy/smart was NOT considered “cool”.

Now, was it ABSURD and HORRIBLE that people were made fun of for these reasons?

YES. No qualifications. YES. I WAS ONE OF THEM.

Does it therefore make it justifiable for the people who still harbor resentment over these childhood slights to act EXACTLY THE SAME WAY towards people they consider stupid?

NO. No qualifications. NO. I’m NOT one of them, TG/TloG.

When I make fun of someone for being stupid, it’s because they’re an a$$hole – who also happens to be stupid. But “a$$hole” is the key to the equation, not “stupid”.

Some people are less smart than others.

Doesn’t make them “less” of a person any more than being less: attractive, “cool”, popular, fashionable, successful, rich, famous…

I mean, it’s sad really: I see groups of “intellectuals” gather together at the metaphorical school lunch table and trade smart comments and make fun of all the not-as-cool “dumb” people…

And it’s DEJA VU…of the groups of jocks and preps gathered together at the school lunch table (really) trading sports and fashion comments and making fun of all the not-as-cool “geeky/dorky/nerdy/smart” people.

Everyone is ignorant of something. A true intellectual seeks to teach those that wish to learn, not mock those that haven’t yet.

The Crusading Intellectual – as the CA/A – seeks not to educate for the sake of educating. They seek to insult and degrade, for the purpose of inflating their own feelings of self-worth.

-Puppy >.< Yip!

Knights Of Badassdom (2013)

About a group of really-into-it LARPers (is there any other kind?).

Well the trick is either a) getting LARPers who can ACT – on film – or b) getting actors good enough to convince people they like LARPing when they don’t.

As a D+D fan I find it mildly interesting when it’s a mixture of playful/serious gaming, IC/OOC commenting, playful self-mockery, etc. This is done fairly well.

However, when it tries to become a “horror” movie, the lack of a budget makes it completely unscary and makes the rest not nearly as fun.

And this is about half an hour in.

It then gets progressively worse and worse until it is absolutely TERRIBLE.

D+D fans might like the first 30 mins or so.

Inspirational Quote: “We’ll be back you redneck c@cksuckers…this I vow.”

Grade: D-

Snowpiercer (2013)

Sucked in by the description? Me too.

The “main” story is supposedly about mankind’s effort to stop global warming by releasing a large amount of some chemical into the atmosphere – a plan that apparently backfires in a Twilight Zone “hot/cold” episode sort of a way.

But the real story is about a train containing the last remnants of humanity, where class and treatment are organized by proximity to the front (engine) of the train.

Apparently the train has been running for almost 20 years and the “upper”, “middle”, and “lower” classes have been more and more clearly defined, with the lower of course existing only to serve the upper. There’s also a sort of Godhood that has developed concerning the supposed leader, “Wilford”, and his sacred engine.

It’s got some really weird/freaky/stupid images and lines.

It’s also got some really weird/freaky/impressive images. Not many lines though.

The idea itself is enough to get through the low parts. I thought at one point it was going to grind to a halt (metaphorically speaking) but it actually got better as it went along, at least to a point.

More inspired than ‘The Hunger Games’, that’s for sure.

Grade: C+

So What?

I like to think I have something that most CA/A’s lack: a sense of humor.

So what’s the big deal with NdT’s tweets?

He spent maybe a grand total of 15 minutes of his life conceiving, composing, and posting them.

Get over it, people…at least he doesn’t spend his LIFE ranting on and on about something he considers so trivial – which is what separates him from CA/A’s.

-Puppy >.< Yip!

OK, OK…Just ONE More…

I KNOW, I KNOW…but they’re such EASY targets.

The most fervent/insane Crusading Atheists/Antitheists (in their various splinter groups, as they refuse to be defined; much like the group in the video below) love to say that religion “has never done any good” and “is responsible for all the world’s problems”.

These statements are both false and COMPLETELY illogical.

Statistically speaking, to suggest NO good has EVER come from religion is a VIRTUAL IMPOSSIBILITY, even by PURE CHANCE.

Statistically speaking, to suggest ALL problems have as their SOLE CAUSE “religion” is a VIRTUAL IMPOSSIBILITY as well.

Therefore, the most fervent of the “pro-logic” CA/A’s are, by definition, ILLOGICAL. It’s a simple formula, really. Even *I* understand it!

10/16/16: FAIR USE: CRITICISM – Good clip from a decent, overrated movie. (housekeeping)

No Offense, But…

“Is it my misperception, or are 99% of those arguing for the absolute right of Americans to see #TheInterview rich white straight males?”

Just a factual analysis of the four demographics mentioned in this statement, taking it purely at face value:

Rich: Incorrect and extremely inaccurate. If, by rich, you mean rich for a U.S. citizen; which I assume you mean when you say “Americans”. I don’t think the VAST majority of the people complaining are rich. I think the vast majority are low-to-middle-income…you know, the TARGET DEMOGRAPHIC of the movie.

White: Much more accurate, certainly, since there are lots of white people in the U.S…and since it features white people as the “stars”, probably the target demographic. So…”99 percent”? I don’t think so. Incorrect, but not nearly as inaccurate as “rich”.

Straight: ABSOLUTELY no idea. I wasn’t aware that sexual preference had anything to do with liking or not liking mediocre lowbrow slapstick satires where lots of sh1t blows up. I wasn’t aware of it probably because there is little relation, and CERTAINLY not enough of a relation to make it “99 percent” a “straight” movie. This is more mind-boggling that it’s even mentioned than anything else.

Males: Again, as with “white”, much more accurate than “rich” or “straight”. Because, AGAIN, the target demographic for mediocre lowbrow slapstick satires with lots of sh1t blowing up IS male. I’ve heard it called Three Stooges-ish, and if that’s correct, then CERTAINLY male is the demographic from my experience. And I LOVE the Stooges. But they were funny, this probably not nearly as much. But even here, “99 percent” is incorrect, if LESS inaccurate than “rich” or “straight”.

-Puppy >.< Yip!

When It’s Good To Be In The One Percent – Satire By Puppy (Part Three)

1) Agreed.
2) Agreed.
3) Interesting…
4) I’d refer you to Tim Meadows’ “Whitey” bit, but I don’t know where it is.

And to end, yet another time reminded of this:

“Is it not possible that an objective approach that frowns upon personal connections between the entities examined will harm people, turn them into miserable, unfriendly, self-righteous mechanisms without charm and humour?”

-Puppy >.< Yip!

When It’s Good To Be In The One Percent – Satire By Puppy (Part Two)

Well…there are only a few things I can think of that he could possibly be trying to say…

1) I’m very bad at statistics.
2) I want to say something to ingratiate myself to my followers.
3) Propaganda is a horrible thing, unless it’s mine.
4) I fully believe that virtually all people who make any comment at all supporting this probably-cr@ppy movie are not doing so for any legitimate reason whatsoever: 99 percent of them are just rich, ruling-class oppressors who don’t care about anything that doesn’t affect rich straight white males and are just venting about something to make themselves feel better about how horrible they are in their ruling-class oppressiveness.

Next, the final chapter: Answers!

When It’s Good To Be In The One Percent – Satire By Puppy

Preface: This is satire mocking a statement I consider absurd.

Ok, so I haven’t had much material to work with lately, but this is pretty decent…so let’s give it a whirl:

“Is it my misperception, or are 99% of those arguing for the absolute right of Americans to see #TheInterview rich white straight males?” – A tweeter who wants DESPERATELY to be relevant.

First, let me translate this post for people not as pseudo-intellectual as he is.

Second, I will analyze possible meanings.

Third, I shall respond.

Ok, here’s the translation into (IMPO, 6.9 on it) what he actually MEANT:

“I’m going to phrase this in the form of a semi-rhetorical question as opposed to an angry/angsty statement because I think I’m clever, and also so I can give the appearance of having a sense of humor and a willingness to listen to opposing viewpoints. In reality, I have none, and I have none…I exist to spout my propaganda AKA Paul Pierce (that’s a little in-joke for my sports fan readers!), and all who disagree are inherently wrong, since my propaganda is the BEST propaganda!”

Whew…that’s the first four words…moving on…

“I’ve done no actual research into the statistics of this, but based solely on a quick scan of posts I’m going to make a summary judgement invoking stats I pulled out of my rather tight a$$”

Ummm…that’s the 99% part…so, FIVE words this time. So I guess what he’s saying here is that he’s part of the 1 percent. OH! Sorry, just a little propagandic nonsense in line with my subject. Anyhoo…

“Making any sort of comment whatsoever supporting freedom of expression and against allowing another country to control what we see/watch/listen to; be it strong, light, joking, satirical…any comment at all…”

Notice the use of EXTREME words for propagandic purposes. It’s a little trick propagandists have: if you use a STRONGER word, your argument seems stronger. So in this case any snide off-hand remark about the subject falls into “arguing for the absolute right”. See how that works?

“Of people living in the United States to see #TheInterview”

He seems to forget that there are other people called “Americans” that do not live in the United States. But hey, he’s just your typical white male, it’s to be expected…dunno about the rich or straight parts, but who cares?

“Greedy capitalist pig non-minority oppressors of minorities?”

“rich white straight males?” denotes a complete lack of minority status: the oppressors of minorities, therefore, because one thing intrinsically means the other.

Phew…next, part two: possible (complete) meanings.

Deep Puppy Thoughts (Part 79)

A theory: ‘Tales From The Darkside’ episodes are in fact promo videos financed by Yoda and Obi-Wan Kenobi to show just how STUPID the “Dark Side” is.


I think the next meme featuring Gene Wilder as Willy Wonka in that all-too-familiar pose should be captioned:

“Oh…you made a meme using this. How original of you.”

Now THIS Is What Upset Them So Much

Warning: Clicking on this link may make you subject to North Korean hacking.

It’s also pretty graphic.

But hey, here goes!

And, in related news of similar seriousness and importance:

10/16/16: FAIR USE: CRITICISM – I like this clip. Oh boy. (housekeeping)

I Am Puppy Hear Me Degrade – Sensitive Antitheist Post Of The Day (12/14/14)

Concerning a woman who was burned to death, in the comments section after someone made a well-meaning (whether you believe in God or not) comment praying for her and her family:

“Prayers to a god who just sat there and let this happen. If her dying that way was a part of your god’s plan, then it was as he meant it to be and you should stop nagging him with your silly prayers. More likely though, there is no god and prayer is a waste of time.”

DTPLAPB – A Pupdate

Maybe the reason he said “I can’t breathe” when he COULD is because it would have taken a bit longer to say “Excuse me officer but I’m having a very difficult time breathing here, so could you kindly remove me from the chokehold/headlock before it comes to the point where I actually technically precisely CANNOT breathe? Thank you.”

-Puppy >.< Yip!

Heated Discussions Over Trivial Matters OR Talking To A CA/A – By Puppy

It’s like the great “Oxford Comma” debate.

I have a clip that displays the usefulness and necessity of any such arguments.

NOTE: This is NOT meant IN ANY WAY to insult people with autism or ANY OTHER mental illness. It’s called satire…mental illness is real and people with it deserve sympathy, not mockery. The satire is directed at CA/A’s and other people who spend hard time on pointless trivialities.

If you watch it and laugh at CA/A’s, great. If you watch it and don’t care, fine. If you are ignorant and think I’m a jerk, I don’t care. And if you watch it to make fun of people with mental illness, I kindly invite you to go f@ck yourself. Vis:

10/16/16: FAIR USE: CRITICISM – Good clip from a good movie. (housekeeping)