Deep Puppy Thoughts (Part 164)

If you’re REALLY REALLY REALLY intellectual and are talking to someone else that is, and they say something that really annoys/insults you, you might consider the following response, before walking away.

It’s inappropriate for almost any occasion.

“Using a colloquialism to ingratiate yourself with the rabble? How very sad. How *really* very sad.”

How To Find What You’re Looking For – A Search Guide By Puppy

Hi there.

If you are reading this, you may be having some trouble finding what you’re looking for on this site. Or, you’re just curious.

So here’s a quick guide:

If you’re looking for something EXACT…like, say, a movie review for ‘The Shining’…go to the “search” bar, and type in “the shining” (without quotes of course). That should bring up what you want.

If you’re looking for something EXACT, and CANNOT find it using the above method…type in a word or two of what you’re looking for, as I may have it listed slightly differently than the full title you’re entering.

For example, if you’re looking for a review of the first ‘Masters of Horror’ episode, and are having trouble finding it, try typing in “mountain road”, or “masters”, etc…this should bring up what you’re looking for.

If you’re looking for a specific CATEGORY…like, say, movies…scroll down from the opening blog page, keeping an eye on the left-hand side of the screen. Eventually, you will pass entries grouped by date…keep scrolling down, and RIGHT BELOW the entries grouped by date you will find entries grouped by CATEGORY.

Then, simply click on the category you’re interested in, and all the posts in that category will appear. Scroll through/read them at your pleasure, and enjoy.

So, for example, if you’re curious about Grimmsy (and who isn’t?) but don’t want to read the rest of the cr@p I post, you would scroll down until you saw the category entitled “Grimmsy Grimmling”. Then simply click on that, and all Grimmsy Grimmling entries should appear.

If you’re looking to read all my movie reviews, click on “Movie/Long Subject Reviews”…etc, etc.

Masters Of Horror: Incident On And Off A Mountain Road (2005)

In 50 years or so – if not sooner – the intro to these short films will be about as scary as your average cheezy 60’s horror movie poster/intro/movie is today.

When the axe drops in the intro: HAIKIBA!

But on with the review:

A woman tries to turn the tables on a psycho, with varying degrees of success; her methods are explained in flashbacks.

Interesting premise. Interesting advice.

But it doesn’t progress much from said premise, so there’s really little point in watching.

I mean, the intro…the flashbacks, the initial “chase”, the endless story possibilities provided…at a certain point they just collapse, and you’re left with nothing except some disturbing images and an incredibly weak and unconvincing ending.

Grade: D-

Sweeney Todd (2007)

Disney makes singing tolerable by the assurance that their movies very probably – at least – don’t stink.

This isn’t a Disney movie, and I’m not a big enough fan of Depp/Burton to plow through it.

Supposedly it’s really good, and if you’re a Depp/Burton fan you’re probably gonna see it no matter what, just like any other Depp/Burton/(sometimes)Elfman movie.

But I really couldn’t care less.

Grade: Incomplete

Grimmsy Grimmling – Pupdate, 9/23/16

Yes, *STILL* expected to premier (with pictures, yet) in (admittedly late) September.

It’s so close I can almost taste it!!!

How many Grimmsy strips will there eventually be?

Good questions! Shall I?

Well, I’ve got a good solid 70+ in tentative idea stages, some closer to actual ready-to-be-written form, others more vague. And my very mildly creative mind continues to work on them!

And yes, for those wondering, there WILL be a story arc. That is to say, it won’t be strip after strip of only “here’s one, no relation to the others”…some will be sort of one-shot ideas, but the basic storyline is already extremely vaguely planned and will develop over time, so if you’d like to follow Grimmsy’s life and times, lucky you.

EXCITED PUPPY!

Lost City Lanes – Like Riding A Bike – Sort Of

Ok, so it’d been a while since I claimed my rightful place at the head of the LCL Common Market.

BUT…this time, I have to admit, first place is legit…WITHOUT me.

And in the spirit of good sportsmanship and healthy competition, I will report:

Current Real High Score In LCL: 2,664 Holder: chotter911

Current Real 2nd Place Cuz He Made Too Many D@mn Mistakes In LCL And Couldn’t QUITE Make It Up Late: 2,553 Holder: Me

Ah well, Subeta’s my thang, baby. Give it a whirl, it’s pretty cool.

-Puppy >.< Yip!

For Those Of You Eagerly Awaiting Grimmsy Grimmling And/Or A New Review

Well, I got nothin’, so here’s a way to kill a few minutes by reading a peg solitaire guide.

http://www.chessandpoker.com/peg-solitaire-solution.html

The guide’s pretty good, actually. Informative, kinda witty.

Caveat Webtor.

– Puppy >.< Yip!

Grumpy Old Puppy (Part 1)

And now with a commentary, a grumpy old puppy.

I’m old, and I don’t like it.

I HATE IT!

In my day, we didn’t have these “bicycle helmets” and “kneepads” and “armpads”; flabbity floobity!

In my day, there was only one kind of helmet: it was called “use every other part of your body to shield your head if you fall off or you’ll crack your skull open”. And that’s the way it was, and we LIKED it!

In my day, we didn’t have all this attention to SAFETY and concerns about not wanting your child to fall off their bike. In my day, there was only one form of bicycling concern: it was called “if you fall off and scrape yourself somewhere and start crying enough times you’ll learn”. That’s right, it was almost encouraged to fall off your bike and sustain minor injury. Because it put the fear of God into you, and eventually when you got the little push on the concrete sidewalk and had to fend for yourself you DIDN’T fall off. And when you finally didn’t fall off, you got rewarded with a glass of soda and an ice cream bar.

You were woozy from mild concussions and bleeding all over from small cuts but you had some ice cream, and that’s the way it was, and we LIKED it! WE LOVED it, oh happy day!

That’s right, we had little to no concern for minor injuries and the only safety measure we took was to have someone looking to yell “here comes a car!” so you didn’t get plowed into while you were learning by falling off and scraping yourself to protect your skull from getting cracked open.

And that’s the way it was, and we LIKED it! WE LOVED it! Oh, happy day!!!

This Will NOT Receive An Illustration

Picture of a really big can with “Twelve Gallons” written on the front of it as a label, and a dull yellow-ish liquid visible; see through somehow, can has marks to the left indicating it is moving (arrows pointing rightwards, can is bent forward slightly to indicate quick movement). The entire thing is in a picture frame.

I just can’t work that into Grimmsy 🙁

Deep Puppy Thoughts (Part 160)

Why did the Ark of the Covenant destroy all of the lights and recording equipment before killing the Nazis at the end of ‘Raiders’?

What happens on Ark-Island stays on Ark-Island.

Just a TINY sample of the kind of brilliant wit you’ll find in Grimmsy (c) R ™ (dm) (gaaftooiycclw) (Puppy Comics, a subsidiary of ConHugeCo), coming SOON to this website!!!

My Alexa.com Website Ranking

DaPuppy.com = 21,259,247

Date of last ranking update: 11/3/16

All-Time High = 21,119,070 (9/27/16)

It’s amazing, because when I was just an eensy meensy teensy little schmeensy and they asked “What do you want to be when you grow up?”, I said “I wanna have a website of my own in the top 21.2 million”, and then they said “What’s a website?” and I said “I dunno” and they just sort of looked at me really funny.

Approximate date of comment’s first relevance: 9/10/16

11/7/16: This post has been abandoned. See ‘Black Mirror – Episode 8 (Nosedive)’

Apology, Explanation, And Onward

I apologize for the delay in Grimmsy Grimmling, it was due to me being a selfish, insensitive, self-centered a$$hole.

I’m trying not to be any of those things now, or in the future, especially for people who absolutely don’t deserve it, and MOST ESPECIALLY for Dave and Jet – the two best friends I’ve ever had or could ever have.

I love you both, and I echo the sentiment of the following clip from the character of Carlito (towards two people INFINITELY more worthy of it than his target).

2:37-3:00

You’re the family I choose (gender irrelevant in the following quote):

“Hey! Kleinfeld is my brother. Look at me! He’s my brother.”

Grimmsy Grimmling – Pupdate, 9/3/16

Ok, so…

The artist (well, person that draws sh1t and wants money) that I talked to EXTENSIVELY about drawing Grimmsy (and a background), sent mails back and forth, hammered out the details, made an agreement that I assumed was semi-immediate, and PAID…

Put me on a 4.5 (told it would be at least 6.5) day waiting list to even START. They told me this AFTER I paid them. Lovely.

So ummmm…FCK em.

I’m gonna post the comic. One way, or another. Fact.

I hate mercenaries. Other fact.

“Non-sequitur. Your facts are unco-ordinated.”

Perhaps.