http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/04/29/cop-smiles-after-shooting-dog_n_5235504.html?utm_hp_ref=crime&icid=maing-grid7|main5|dl1|sec3_lnk4%26pLid%3D470237
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=67lWS_zno6E
0:24-0:36
I mean, come on. I’m not saying I KNOW anything, but come on…think about it.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
10/16/16: FAIR USE: CRITICISM – Great clip from a great movie. (housekeeping)
Hey, it’s Bob Solo. Better not let him out of the car.
After seeing the opening caption I was ready, and sure enough…spotted at 22 minutes and change. Recurring, yet.
This is not another ‘1313’ movie, despite the title. I’ve learned my lesson well.
Watched mainly to test my memory from age 13-14 of it being good; part I remembered best from before: future ‘Shawshank’ guard getting the sh1t beaten out of him.
It’s a very dark movie, mostly prison-type scenes. It’s also far too long…there’s a lot of dull/mediocre sh1t that should have been trimmed, especially in the second half. But it holds up decently for the most part.
And yeah, it’s the long version, and yeah, it’s off NF streaming IMMINENTLY.
Grade: C
In case anyone’s wondering, I never review a television/cable/Netflix/etc series (Basically anything with episodes) until that series is over.
Movies are much easier since even if they’re “episodic” they take at least a year or so between “episodes”. So reviewing them is far easier in terms of relevance.
So if you’re looking for a review of ‘House of Cards’ or ‘The Walking Dead’, you won’t find any here until both series are over, if at all.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
The opening ‘Scream’ parody is pretty good.
The rest is a mixed bag, with lots of unfunny parodies/jokes and a few other decent ones.
Other Favs: ‘Reservoir Dogs’ slow-walk mock, recurrent driving disaster memories, and a few other ultra-quick bits.
Near the end it gets REALLY dull, unfortunately…you can pretty much turn it off after the last driving flashback.
I reviewed it because it’s off NF streaming SOON, if you care.
Grade: D
A He Said/She Said buildup to a blind date between two somewhat insecure people.
Then there’s an animated date, featuring lots of dialogue (some bland, some out of place, some somewhat interesting) and a bunch of revealing and sometimes amusing thought bubbles.
It’s sort of sweet that they both seem to be trying (the guy’s thought bubbles aren’t QUITE as sweet, but he seems decent otherwise) and I found myself hoping for these two stick figure cartoon characters to get together. Rowr.
Perhaps I’m too close to the subject, but it was a bit sad nearing and at the end and it actually made me feel…hence the grade. Recommended to anyone socially/romantically inept/confused/depressed/anxious.
Inspirational Quote: “I would love some coffee.”
Grade: B-
A rabbit is created and put through many wildly varied and conflicting scenarios by the animator.
Basically, think ‘Duck Amuck’ with a rabbit and grossness, and without nearly as much quality.
It moves along quickly and there are moments of inspired weirdness and cuteness, so I’d say go for it if you’re a fan of Don or the Daffy short.
Inspirational Suggestion: “…The Pretentious Student Film?”
Grade: C+
A lack of wisdom is displayed in a long short consisting basically of one guy pulling an endless stitch out of some other guy’s throat.
At 3:47 something finally happens, and it gets really weird. And very silly. And the one truly amusing gross part doesn’t last very long and turns generic-cartoon-gross/boring until the imminent, thankful end.
Grade: D-
Borrowing from a somewhat-obscure ‘Flying Circus’ sketch…
If you ever find yourself in an argument with someone over something that you are sure you’re right about, and they insist they’re right when they’re completely wrong, AND they refuse to consider your opinion, AND they get really nasty and mean about it, consider this useful conversation ender before turning and calmly walking away:
“What do you know about it? What do you know about getting up at five o’clock in t’morning to fly to Paris, back at the Old Vic for drinks at twelve, sweating the day through press interviews, television interviews and getting back here at ten to wrestle with the problem of a homosexual nymphomaniac drug-addict involved in the ritual murder of a well known Scottish footballer???”
Three things made better by the policy:
1) It’s easier!
2) It makes my brain hurt less
3) It’s more predictable for you, the reader. You don’t have to go back re-reading old sh1t unless you want to just re-read it…no “searching in case of new material/edits”. With the exceptions described.
Although 3 is the least important to me (sorry) it IS actually MORE anal than sometimes editing, sometimes not. It’s a more (not totally, but more) rigid, predictable, “set” way of doing things.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
Excepting things where I may “experience” the exact same thing more than once and have a different reaction (television, movies, music and the like) I will NOT go back through my entries and edit for “current feeling” or to make it be more persuasive, “look” better, be more properly worded…
I made the entries that I made. I’m not the same person as I was when I made them…I can’t know my exact frame of mind/reference at the time of any. Therefore, they exist with flaws and all.
There may be a VERY few exceptions to this, but generally old posts will remain old posts; as they are, left to be read as they are.
So if something I say tomorrow seems at odds with something I said three years ago…take the much older one as a snapshot of how I felt about it THEN, and the new one as how I feel about it NOW.
Also keep in mind that my satire bits don’t ALWAYS have the warning.
Conclusion: If you’ve read a post from three years ago, it’s probably not gonna be any different if you go back and read it again.
Exceptions: VERY, VERY few outside of Music (rare), Television/Short Subject (extremely uncommon), MST3K (extremely uncommon) and Movies/Long Subject (somewhat common, actually…that’s my bread and butter, man!)
-Puppy >.< Yip!
4/22/16: Content slowly and painfully edited to look better, make sad and happy smilies work, and remove/fix bad links.
Several times, during otherwise boring commercial breaks, we receive exciting news:
Southwest Airlines DOES, in fact, give you a small cup of ice with liquid and a tiny packet of peanuts.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
“If you wanna cheat, cheat fair. Anything I hate is a crooked crook.” – M. Howard
“HOWLS, howls of derisive laughter, Bruce.” – M. Palin
-Puppy >.< Yip!
You’d be surprised (I struggled with whether to say that or not, because YOU might not be surprised, but SOME people would…but I put it anyway, forcing me to type this explanation) at how much chaos theory impacts your life. Even with my unbelievably simplistic Ian Malcolm-explained level of understanding of the subject, it’s extremely interesting.
Here is an example from a common everyday scenario:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ixeRWrg0yg
Note the EXTREME divergence beginning with a simple statement at 1:51.
10/16/16: FAIR USE: CRITICISM – Good clip from a great show. (housekeeping)
For those of you who have enjoyed my bitter, angry, frustrated posts in the past…
Sorry :(
In future Puppy will be kinder and gentler because Puppy cannot tolerate the intense pain he is very frequently forced to live with. So, in conjunction with his psychiatrist (Yeah, really, I have one!) he shall be taking a prescription medication that (probably and hopefully) rather dulls his pain, anger, and frustration.
The flip side is it will probably dull his wit, energy, (brief moments of) happiness, etc… as well.
But hey…you gotta do what you gotta do. Hopefully my posts will retain their level of quality. :) <---- content Puppy (That's content as in being content...there isn't a puppy inside my face).
Aha! Can’t find the video, but I can find the script.
Here are some brilliantly perceptive pieces of advice and encouragement given to Mick Jagger (OLD SNL SKETCH):
“Well, look, you’ll both be nervous. But, then, you remember that
you love each other, you know, and that you trust each other, and
that you’ve had two kids together.”
“It’s hard to describe, really, partly because I’m drunk.”
“I mean, like, you get a warm feeling when you’re at the studio,
and you’ve been working hard all day, and you get a call, and
it’s her. And you ask her, “Who?” You know, because you’re not
sure. You don’t remember. But then, you have a guy that you pay,
who reminds you who everyone is, and he tells you it’s your wife,
your soulmate, your friend-for-life, and it just feels great.”
NF streaming description incorrect. It should read, IMPO: “After making out while drunk and depressed with some guy, he rapes her”. Just to prepare those who are expecting a one-night-stand.
It should, IMPO, further read: “He gives her some horrific illness that slowly degenerates her body, life, morality, and sanity – in that order. Near the end she goes psycho, destroys everyone she cares about, and then is VERY briefly an infected/zombie. The End.”
I mean, that’s it…and there’s no point. How is this so unlike ‘Jenifer’, then? In ‘Jenifer’ there’s a choice. And it’s fcken scary. This is just: “you’re fcked, you’re gonna fck over everyone you know, then you’re gonna die. There’s nothing you can do about it.” And it’s not scary, just gross.
Basically this tries to appeal to the gross, nasty visuals crowd. But if you want gross, nasty visuals there are SO many movies out there that are ALL gross, nasty visuals. So this is pointless.
The acting is decent, so I can’t possibly give this an F. But I’d really, really like to.
Grade: D-
6/23/18: I had a feeling this was better than I gave it credit for. And I was right, sort of. The female lead is convincing, and the grossness is … interesting. There’s precious little more, but it is interesting if you LIKE gross. Not “tolerate if there’s something more to it-gross”, but LIKE. The nasty-horrible-vicious-little side of me does sometimes. Oh, and there’s a very powerful anti-lesbian message here. Methinks the director doth get rejected too much. Grade: D
1:30 onward: A still-impressive visual display that relates closely to my current dating life.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NHWjlCaIrQo
Oh shut up, I’m not feeling sorry for myself. That was last week. Now I’m just grinning/chuckling about how clever I am. Even if I’m not. Shrug…if it’s good enough for Billy…
I really like the intro to this…nice flow of time to the pictures.
And the couple becomes likeable 10 mins in, when the husband shows a good sense of humor and some wit, and the wife shows (I think) faithfulness, cuteness, and obvious (I think) love.
Shortly after that the teapot arrives on scene.
I like the sorta-BDSM scene but that’s probably cuz the wife is hot.
I also like her well-worded vagina defense, which takes place during one of the last really interesting scenes (a mostly-vegan meal clash).
There ends the good portion of the review. Because unlike how I expected this to go, it turns to (attempts at) humor and absurdity. The humor is sometimes dark, but more often it’s medium: not light-hearted, but not good enough for dark either. Luke-warm.
It’s just tedious after a while, the silly quality having destroyed any chance of emotional attachment or taking anything seriously…at least for me.
Eventually things end, probably as you expected them to after a certain point.
Great idea, decent start…WRONG direction. This should have been a thriller, a creepy morality play. Not a comedy. Or it should have been a really funny comedy, which it wasn’t.
Grade: D
This project has been abandoned due to lack of my interest.
Ok. I don’t care about sequence or completeness anymore with F+S…I just wanna review the funny stuff. So this works for now.
Pretty darn good…consistent and without cr@p filler or big fat ugly nasty disgusting guys.
And hey, I saw the original…good mockery.
Worth a watch.
CORRECTION: Search for “French And Saunders Titanic”.
How is this different from most episodes? Ummm…it’s got a Christmas sketch or two.
Actually this is mostly just tolerable…kinda cute, but not funny or even that amusing.
Exceptions:
Jennifer’s chocolate sucking
camel head/instant baby
horrific F+S backup singing
Jennifer’s sensible heroin
Jennifer’s brilliant video idea
Those are like, 2-3 minutes total. Decide for yourself.
Wait for it…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jA1kaFgLuh0
10/16/16: FAIR USE: CRITICISM – Great clip from a great show. (housekeeping)
Sometimes when I feel like absolute sh1t, I try to think of this: (3:22-3:38).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=arZMvWXxe30 (Ignore the title, it’s really stupid, I know)
And you know what?
It doesn’t do a bit of fcken good.
But hey, great movie.
So, do they add music/dance because they think it’s GOOD? Or just because they need to pad the…episode? Cuz I hear love does that.
In any case this is wretched outside of the first part of the rhinoplasty sketch and an INTENSE STARE by a subtle Dawn. That’s like…3 minutes.
Season Two ENDS here, Thank God. This is easily their worst. In future, I think I shall skip bad episodes as I did for other shows. Still have to watch them though :(
Lowlights:
horrible song and dance number
June Whitfield interaction/shameless promotion
Lulu’s song
really dumb song from boring sketch
yes, ANOTHER boring song
and another…
and another…
and the ending one.
This…is…painful, at times. Skip.
Highlights:
Intro ADVENTURE sketch
pictures of Jennifer’s a$$
cris-py crunchy crust
some of Saunders’ dining franticness
Lowlights:
underground musical number
REALLY bad Elvis sketch
Raw Sex again, and again
boring living room sketch
most of dining room sketch
ending
Quick review/advice: watch the first 35-40 and last 4-5 minutes. Skip the other 80 or so.
My first impression was: French. It’s artsy. Competent but boring.
Then: Gets more clever, I can tell (I think) the messages it’s sending without being hit over the head with them, and I chuckle/smile a bit. The way she finds a secret compartment is clever, especially after being led in a different direction. Then it slowly meanders and starts to lose me until…
About 40 minutes in, I’d had enough. And though I watched the rest of it, I really didn’t care. It was drudgery and “Yeah, real clever. Wonderful. Oh, great…yeah. How much time is left??”.
To explain, I would say that the clever bits either stopped being clever or COMPLETELY lost my interest because they were leading to dull/dumb things if they led anywhere at all. The talking to the camera didn’t draw me in…thank God. I didn’t wanna be in. It was the same as the rest, no better or worse. Equivalent, let’s say, for the sticklers, as opposed to equal.
Quite frankly I found Amelie herself more pretentious and weird than interesting. Weird does NOT equal interesting. The two are not intrinsically connected, although they certainly converge in many instances. This, to me, is not one of them. And despite all of her weirdness, I find her acts of inspiration rather stupid random chaos.
Her signature moves are smiling impishly, and letting others (including the narrator) talk for her.
I mean, I don’t buy it. I don’t buy it at all. Not one bit, not after :40:00.
I get the messages…like when she asks her father a deep question and he responds by saying something unrelated and dull, my interpretation is “they’re showing how different they are and how she longs for someone to understand her, etc…”. I get that. I just don’t think it’s really any more clever than the next DECENT movie giving messages in exactly the same way. Without being brilliant. Just like this.
Parts are just overblown and annoying, because they’re supposed to be brilliant but I know they’re not. I particularly groaned (not just bored, annoyed) at the artsy-craftsy visuals.
Vastly overrated. After 40, it’s barely watchable. And it HURTS.
Grade: D-
Confusing new intro…kinda interesting. Solid episode.
Highlights:
Dawn and Jennifer: VERY naughty schoolgirls (a long one)
medieval French and Saunders
mostly silent Italian practice
French WANTING a sandwich…Saunders’ escape route
French and Saunders schoolgirl mocking/semi-fight/Spam reference!
Saunders decking French
flying cat
not-quite-a cat
Lowlights:
Raw Sex number…can’t seem to get rid of them
big fat ugly nasty horrid humping guys…see above
EXCITING new intro! Kinda cute. Probably the highlight.
Actual show: Pretty poor…skip it.
They do a bunch of parodying, which I hear they do well later in their careers…but in THIS piece of work, they mostly suck.
Highlights:
Dawn’s Latin(?)
shaky microphone
tasteless Ginger Rogers dance number
tasteless fur-wearers parody
Lowlights:
Katherine Hepburn bit (most of it)
musical number
tasteless bodybuilding sketch (except the end)
packing discussion (except near the end)
Farton sisters
Baby Sue singing…blah.
ending cracks
Not as good as 7, but better than season one. A bit, a bit.
Highlights:
Dawn’s intro (even better, great)
weather bit
Thumper discussion
impressive bad joke
chambermaids behaving badly
“Because The Night”…finally (I know what I said, but it’s cool)
Saunders the ballerina warming up
Lowlights:
big fat ugly nasty guys (thank God they brought them back)
bad music
issue sketch
Dawn’s foley kick
most of the ballerina sketch
ending (don’t hang around for it)
“…he looked like a doctor.
He did, actually.
That’s true.
But he wasn’t, unfortunately.”
A lunatic who believes he is a doctor escapes from confinement and carries out his “work”.
He’s pretty creepy and/or campy when he’s not giggling stupidly.
Somewhat better than your typical cr@p horror flick. And there are a few clever, funny moments amidst all the stupid ones.
Inspirational Quote: “Terminal.”
Grade: D
7/14/18: The Great Grade Update. Grade: D+
If you, like many I’ve read, admire Doc’s attitude (as portrayed by Val Kilmer below, at least) then please consider this:
“Tsunetomo believed that becoming one with death in one’s
thoughts, even in life, was the highest attainment of purity
and focus. He felt that a resolution to die gives rise to a
higher state of life, infused with beauty and grace beyond
the reach of those concerned with self-preservation.”
– Wikipedia on Yamamoto Tsunetomo
Doc WAS dying, but still, I think there’s a point there.
Is it just me, or do some of the archers at 3:41 look like they’ve never seen a bow and arrow before?
Like, “Hmmmm…how does this thing work? I guess you put this HERE, and…man I shoulda practiced this.”
(There’s a ‘Gladiator’ clip out there somewhere this fits with)
Their perceived incompetence echoes in eternity.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
4/22/16: And off we go again!
They seem to have come back ready…with MATERIAL, yet.
Now this is more like it, and like what I remember.
Highlights:
fallen legbones
3 or 4 only options
beautifully coordinated dance(s)
banter
contraceptive confusion
brief musical healing
bits of insane French during musical duo bit
Dawn’s crawling/popping nipple(?)
hippie French/Saunders at the end of the credits
Lowlights:
bad musical number
Raw Sex, when I thought they were gone
most of musical duo bit
the Dawn-punishing machine
To paraphrase Tony T.:
“I never liked you, (‘Seinfeld’). Not cuz you’re (starring) a Jew, huh. I know plenty of Jews. It’s cuz you’re a (boring) piece of (fluff).
As Buddy Ackerman might ask me: What do you really want?
Well, this is it. Written a bit ago.
I use Buddy because I titled this (no joke, no lie):
“What I Really Want”
and just left it there.
–
Company and Cuddling.
No pressure for sex or anything even sexual.
With a female. Just my preference.
If this sounds like BS to you, ok…
If it sounds stupid to you, ok…
If it sounds nice or sweet or comforting or pleasant…let me know.
–
Only, don’t go letting me know if I don’t know who the hell you are. I’m lonely, not stupid.
Well, not that stupid.
-Puppy >.<
As “SemperxPuppy”. Follow me if you like.
And the reason is: I like getting hits. I like getting comments.
They’re not hugs or cuddles, but they ain’t bad.
You could call me a shamelessly self-promoting consumer whore…BUT, I’m not selling anything. I just LIKE those things. So more accurate would be shamelessly self-promoting attention slut.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
Yes, thank God, they use the louvre in this episode as well.
Ok…I’d recommend…episode 1. And MAYBE 5. And not this one.
On to season 2, yay.
Highlights:
Saunders’ intro, especially her unconvincing arms
Dawn’s cute present-pout
Dawn’s persistent interruptions/playful mocks
Dawn REALLY exploring her sexuality
Lowlights:
Esperanto song
many lulls
guest star led astray
“Eye Of The Tiger”
Dawn dancing to cr@ppy music
Joan Armatrading’s song
French. Saunders. You’re BEYOND ‘The Comic Strip’. Please…please…let it go.
Better reference: ‘The Money Programme’.
“The waiting is the hardest part…”
Highlights:
the rich and emaciated
both of the three basic looks
bosom discussion in the louvre turning into…
menstruation discussion in the louvre
chatty/cheerful severely wounded/dead (a pretty long one, too)
Lowlights:
virtually the entire first 7 minutes
Lots of bits, varied and scattered
Jools Holland’s boring piano playing/music number
ending
It appears, after four episodes, that they have a few good bits per episode and then the rest is closer to rubbish than good. But I KNOW they get better…I’ve SEEN them better.
Oh well…stick with it, Pup.
Highlights:
excited Raw Sex intro
French and Saunders’ amazing and short stunts (and reprise)
Dawn’s subtle BAFTA-snagging
Spanish Dawn’s encroaching on musical number
Dawn peeking
short little ratings bit after the outro
Lowlights:
Scots jokes (and reprises)
links…?
really bad music/dance number
long Spanish(?) musical number
long outro
“You have 966323 Total Visits”
Super, Super.
A rather wet episode. See French and Saunders in bathing suits. Silly ones.
About as good as 2, unfortunately…let’s hope for improvement.
Highlights:
Pixieish French (I have a weakness for her)
“Birth, Bloody Birth”‘s lump of Saunders
French trashing Saunders
Gypsy sketch accents
‘Eeek!…’
Lowlights:
two really fat old disgusting guys humping things
trailer sketch
parts of the gypsy sketch
guy with hats spinning and flipping stuff
a rather weak ending
Enjoy the entries I’ve already made if you like, but I’ve decided to take a LONG break from this, since (virtually) noone seems to care lately.
-Puppy
Same-Day Edit: I REALLY did laugh, too. Briefly, but still…see ‘Pupdate 1/13/13’
Not to be confused with ‘World War Z’. There are a lot of streaming movies that need a tag to that effect regarding some other (major) movie.
People become infected by a space germ and start eating other people.
There’s attention paid to trying to develop characters that you care about, but it’s not done very well so you really don’t care all that much. At least, I don’t. Seems shallow emotionally, superficial; just as bad as if they hadn’t bothered and just gone with all gore.
It’s completely serious, not camp. And it’s just good enough that you can’t really laugh at it, you just have to tolerate it or – maybe, if you see something I don’t – enjoy it mildly as an infected/zombie flick.
The actors seem to do their best, but that doesn’t stop the acting from descending often into B-Grade.
Ok…there’s one moment of REALLY bad gore FX about halfway through, but where it loses my consideration for anything above a D- comes when an infected tears a woman’s arm off and then beats another woman to death with a REALLY bad prop. Maybe that’s not how I wanna go.
About an hour in: bad infected behavior continuity. Lazy, lazy!
The ending drama might do something for you if you’re in the right mood. And you won’t be missing anything if you skip to it to find out.
Grade: D-
When deciding how to categorize my latest (previous) post, I was somewhat undecided…but after I decided, I thought to myself “It’s a musing…call it a musing”…
“Get it??” – DIEner
-Puppy >.< Yip!
Why has NOONE thought of/followed through on a “Best Of Joe Mantegna (aka Richie “The Hammer” Ginelli) From ‘Thinner'” Youtube compilation?
I mean, it would make the mediocre full-length movie into a GREAT short film.
I mean, would I like it? Are you KIDDING? I’d fcken LOVE it!
Come ON, man… (JJ: LD) <— a little rusty on that, hopefully proper form.
It’s a pretty funny short film, sorta like ‘Rejected’ has a lot of.
I like the background music and lead-in to the balloon’s first (pissed) reaction.
The balloon revolution will be animated.
Grade: B
Pissed reaction to rejection/bad dating experiences. (I assume).
It’s not all that clever (it’s not stupid, just not all that clever), so unless you’re watching it for the animated gross “reactions”, it’s not a big loss to miss.
Although Don’s admission (at least, that’s how I see it) that he (the animated male) isn’t exactly without fault in the whole scenario is refreshing. And amusing.
And I like the music.
Grade: C
I’ve decided to go vegetarian. Again. But this time, I think I’m really gonna do it.
Won’t be a snobby/preachy one…just a personal choice. No CA/A contamination here.
Wish me the best. Unless you don’t like me, in which case hope for the worst and I’ll absolutely DELIGHT in either proving you wrong by succeeding or not giving a sh1t because you’re not worth even that amount of thought/feeling.
A winner every time, no blanks!
-Puppy >.< Yip!
Stylish crime drama/action/dark comedy. Stylish like Tarantino, so you don’t really need to know what the actual plot is.
You know, one of those types. Lots of clever references and a few interesting visuals.
It’s a little TOO clever for me most times, though…references that make sense but don’t seem amusing, just self-indulgent.
Or boring, if you prefer.
Not as bad as ‘DIEner”s subtitle, but you get the idea. And if you don’t, check it out.
Ending’s pretty cool, though.
Grade: C-
Yeah, I saw this when it came out. Ahhh…long gone days.
Really dark comedy/horror, of course.
Doesn’t disappoint after a brief interlude of not seeing it. At LEAST ten years…it’s scarier than any movie it references and it feels real.
Good until the very ending, when it gets a bit weak.
Cutest character: David Arquette…awwww.
Great Moment In Nipple Shot History: Rose McGowan
Inspirational Quote: “You fcken hit me with the PHONE, d1ck!”
Grade: B
