Author: Puppy

Semper Puppy

Sorry honeybuns, one more thing…

Dasi baby, WHY in the name of all…NORMAL people…hold sacred would you paint a picture of a woman saying “I’ve been raped!” and then have a bunch of men to the right of her, pointing at her and laughing?  I mean…maybe the VF parasites are cool with that, but…they’re parasites, just like you.

I would re-post it here, but I have SOME semblance of decency. 

-Puppy >.< Yip!

Cheers – Episode 119 (Cheers: The Motion Picture)

Highs:
‘Manchild in Beantown’
random french
Cinemapuss
the on button
puppy!
Judy…
depression seminar
too derivative of Godard
Woody’s shirt size
Norm’s recovery
the thresher
Al

Lows:
Diane film Exposition
film continuity error
the gift sequence

Grade: B (The last ‘Cheers’ episode worth watching)

It’s been a while…

From: “Das But”, Boston, Massachusetts, 32(According to his FB page, at least).

How does he know me?  Dunno…only friend we had in common was Sandy McCahill.

Message as follows, cleaned up to allow younger viewers:

“whats up dude!”

Who the heck are you?

“Saw the tat on your page. wicked cool bro! so do you get
tats and sh1t? i never had one before does it hurt? whats the tat mean?
old english script is hard to read…looks like it says fuzzy
i love fuzzy sh1t.”

Ahhhhh…sarcasm.
No, no sh1t…just tats.
No, actually once they remove the needle and you allow it to heal it’s remarkably non-painful.
Actually it’s “difficult” to read.  There’s no degree of hardness involved.  But it is 20,000 Leagues difficult.
Actually it says “Puppy”.  Which, I’m fairly sure, means “Puppy”.

“youre a f#cking loser”

Such hostility…das ist bad, ya?

“tattoos are for fags.”

That sounds very homophobic, Mr. Das But from Brooklyn now residing in Boston.

“you think a tattoo hurts?”

No, I think, my brain hurts.  Also, every time a bell rings, an angel gets wings.

“try shoving a f#cking
heroin needle filled to the brimb with oxycontin after a cold water
filtration method up your d1ck hole. worth the money and half the price
of getting a tat and making yourself look like a f#cking loser forever.
biggest sign that a man is a loser: tatoo, smokes, makes up companies
that don’t exist so that he looks cool on facebook for his gay f#cking
wastoid loser friends\”

Come on, no fair…you stole that from Shakespeare.

“watertown must be full of fags.”

Lots of small pieces of wood, perhaps…OH…you mean homosexuals.  I’m not hip to the homophobe lingo, my bad.

“you walk
around my street in brooklyn”

So you’re threatening that SOMEONE ELSE will do something if I go SOMEWHERE FAR AWAY…wow…that’s a real brave stance, Das.  I mean, you live in Boston now…why don’t you say something like “You walk around my street in Boston…”?  Because you’re a…let’s go to Wikisaurus here…
‘coward, chicken, yellow belly, gutless wonder, softie, wimp, weakling, wuss’

“with them gay tatoos and a facebook full
of friends,,, “

Again, very homophobic, Mr. But.

“boy howdy”

boy howdy oh boy yeah yowzah yes sir whatamado oh ho 23 skidoo.

“youre just asking fior a kick through your
heroin infested d1ckhole. i bet youre fat”

No, Mr. But, you’re the one that just implied you use heroin needles.  Which is ummm…illegal.

Das thing…I think I love you. *kiss kiss*  You got me down, man…I wanna have wild gay sex with you.
“Ok, I wanna be like, the gimp, ok…now, you have to remember, that my character…that I, that I like, that I’m kept in a TRUNK, alright, in the basement of your HOUSE, ok, and you use me for deviant HARDcore gay SEX, ok…”

-Puppy >.< Yip!

8/21/12: Das But 2: ‘Ich spreche nicht sehr gut Deutsch‘

“Lame response. Gay response.”

I’m sensing you don’t like gay people.  Also, since you think tattoos are for “fags”, you by default don’t like anyone with a tattoo.  I mean…I really don’t care, but you probably don’t wanna go around broadcasting that to the entire world.

-Puppy >.< Yip!

8/23/12: Oh yeah, he doesn’t like black people either.  Check out “Die For Satan” by Das_But on youtube, if you want dull racist nastiness.  Hey Das, you ever actually DO any of this fcked-up sh1t you’re going ON and ON and ON and ON and ON about in your little rants?  No?  Course not, you’re a fcken wannabe.  But I admit, you’re pretty fly(for a white guy).  Now THAT is a good video…dude in that looks kinda like you.  You talk a lot of hype about suicide, but you don’t have the fcken balls to do it.  Too bad.

-Puppy >.< Yip!

9/7/12: Hmmm…still hasn’t done the suicide thing.  Oh well…always knew he was a fake.

-Puppy >.< Yip!

The Terminator (1984)

Has NOT aged well.

And I don’t just mean the special effects…I mean the “dramatic”, “emotional”, and “sensitive” scenes.  And it’s not because it’s from the 80’s…so are ‘Lethal Weapon’ and ‘RoboCop’, and both of those have aged incredibly better than this.

The only good thing about this is the action, really…which is very good, and there’s a lot of it.  But at this point this movie has descended almost entirely into the “cheezy nostalgia” category.  Particularly sad- the hair, the music, the dancing.

Also, it’s difficult to generate sufficient enthusiasm for the purpose of cheering on the continued existence of the early/mid-80’s.

Inspirational Quote: “Sweat, bad breath…everything”

Grade: D+

Interesting Info – ‘Jar Of Flies’

“…According to Staley, the title for the album came
from a science experiment Cantrell conducted in third
grade: “They gave him two jars full of flies. One of
the jars they overfed, the other jar they underfed.
The one they overfed flourished for a while, then all
the flies died from overpopulation. The one they
underfed had most of the flies survive all year.
I guess there’s a message in there somewhere.
Evidently that experiment had a big impact on Jerry.”…”

Wikipedia

Cheers – Episode 38 (Cliff’s Rocky Moment)

Highs:
Diane’s vague stirring memories
Sam’s thinking cap
Diane’s football strategies
real men + Cliff
Diane V. football
Cliff’s muscle
Mountain Lily V. Black-Eyed Susan
DING!
Louis’s change of heart
karate
Carla’s belief
Sam’s non-over-acting
ending

Lows:
Cliff’s laugh
guest star’s over-acting

Grade: A-

The Naked Gun (1988)

It’s basically a really long, really good ‘Police Squad’ episode. 

The writing/supporting cast are both upped a bit…if you hate complete nonsense, you’ll hate this.  But if you appreciate it, this is a very fine example of how complete nonsense can be funny.  It’s not quite to the level of ‘Airplane’, but close.

Tedious: Baseball song sequence, attempt at a “romantic” scene near the end.

Inspirational Quote: “And where the hell was I?”

Grade: B+

Natural Born Killers (1994)

With Tarantino involved, you knew it had to be really well-made sh1t.

Lots of cool cuts and one-liners and flashbacks and flashforwards and flasharounds and aspirations beyond the wonderful nonsense that has been proven to be his limit over and over again.

And it is.

But with Oliver Stone involved, you kinda figured it would rise above that.

But it doesn’t.

He called this a “positive” film???  Because you can go on an insane killing spree and not necessarily get gunned down at the end?  So aspiring serial killers and ultra-anarchists…there’s hope?  What horsesh1t.

Supposedly there’s some good “messages” here…like, violence is bad.  And, people that condemn violence and are supposedly horrified by it, yet pay to see it, hear about it, read about it, etc…are a bunch of stupid hypocrites.  Yeah no sh1t, Oliver.  I didn’t need to see this to know that.  And guess what?  NOONE who watches this who DIDN’T know that will LEARN that.  Either they’re too fcken stupid, or they don’t CARE in the first place.  I mean, you say so yourself in the script…you know, the snake story?

Also, there’s an anti-mass-media message, which is pushed so hard along with the violence that the whole thing comes across as camp, lowering it to the level of ‘Hobo’ or ‘Troll 2’ or ‘Manos’, except Oliver Stone is a REAL director and these are REAL actors making a worthless pile of sh1t masterpiece.

And hey Oliver…you’re condemning glorification of violence and the mass media by remaking ‘Bonnie and Clyde’, except fake?  Right…

Like so many other similarly violent and/or disturbing movies, most of the people willing and/or eager to sit through this don’t care about anything Oliver’s trying to say.  They’re watching this because they’re sick fcks, inside or out, or both, and they enjoy it.  Period.

Me, I’m done.  Fck em.

Grade: C