Author: Puppy

Maybe I’m missing something, but it seems to me that, despite some certainly “interesting” moments, this is the sort of film that people who aren’t particularly intelligent think is clever and that they are really smart for knowing just how clever it is.  Which it isn’t.

Denne filmen suger.

Grade: F-

But the acting (at least I hope it’s acting) is better than in your average useless gorefest, and the heroine’s tenacity and resiliency are impressive.

For every decent horror flick I see (say, ‘Fido’, though that’s more a comedy) I have to sit through ten of these (or worse).  Why do I do it?  The answer, as with the First Citiwide Change Bank, is simple.

Volume.

OR

How to get all your friends into a horror film.

OR

A sign of the state of decline of available Netflix streaming movies.

Inspirational Quote: “I regret nothing!”

Grade: F

However, although nothing in the rest of the movie fully lives up to the intro set-up, it’s moderately entertaining throughout.

The 50’s/60’s conformist nostalgia angle is extremely well done, the movie is amusing if not really “funny”, and it pulls off the best understatedly twisted take on death (look for the magazine) this side of ‘Fallout’.

Inspirational Quote: “You crazy, wonderful zombie!”

Nothing that isn’t shown somewhere else with slightly more excitement/flair…that is to say, any at all.

If you’re waiting for the ending to save it, well…it’s certainly a surprise.

Eric Idle character from MPFC on a film of similar interest level: “Go on, protest, do something about it, assault the manager, demand your money back.” (SATIRE…SATIRE…SATIRE…)

Containing actual ideas beyond gore and Shock-O-Rama, this fairly intelligent and comparatively brilliant entry by Takashi Miike makes one want to hum “One of these things is not like the others…” after watching the first two.  Intriguing, it’s also by far the least bloody of the three films and by far the best.

Grade: C+

It’s not told in anywhere near the same way, it’s not nearly as quirky and it’s much more based on actions than on symbolism and interestingly meaningless dialogue.

It’s also not laughably over-rated as a landmark of American cinema, which is appropriate.

I’d take this over Pulp.  At least I don’t have to watch Travolta dancing again.

Grade: B+

If you want an ‘I Am Legend’ ripoff, ‘Night of the Living Dead’ is infinitely better.

Acting, writing, and directing are all superb.

A truly moving work of art, if you are willing to accept that not all art is beautiful.

Inspirational Quote: “Your father was circumcised by my rabbi you prick!”

Unfortunately, the visual display isn’t supported by dialogue that’s anything more than average, and the heavy-handedness of the rather obvious moral preaching (If you can’t spot the metaphors to reality, distant past and recent past, you need to read more American History) gets a bit tiresome after a while.  Not that I don’t AGREE with it…but you don’t need to slam people over the head with the obvious parallels to reality. 

Think of it sort of as a more ambitious but not as far-reaching sci-fi version of ‘Dances With Wolves’.

Grade: B

The movie is more comedic drama with a bit of intense tragedy thrown in, whereas the book (from what I understand) is much more dark and intellectual.

R.P. McMurphy is an a$$hole, but at least he’s a GENUINE one…and a genuine anything, of course, is very hard to find.

Perhaps slightly over-rated by those who hail it as a masterpiece of American cinema (usually in retrospect after having written middling reviews when it first came out), it nonetheless is a truly great film and a Puppy must-watch, if not own.

Inspirational Quote: “I’m a Godd@mn marvel of modern science”

Grade: D-

It’s not stupid, macho, or corny…but it is boring.

The problem is that the believable characters are unlikeable and the likeable characters are unbelievable.  Jeff Bridges conveys about as much charm as Billy Bob Thornton in ‘Sling Blade’, but his character’s excuse (stupidity/alcoholism) isn’t near as valid as Thornton’s character (severe mental illness).  And Thornton’s character at least has quirks…and interesting dialogue.

Vastly overrated.

The big fat guy in this movie.

I’m not being desensitized to the atrocious, horrible things done in this movie and in “horror” films like it, I’m just amazed at how many of these works of horsesh1t actually make it to film…they’re all the same – Dull, Meaningless, Stupid, Gratuitous…I mean, when you make ‘Friday the 13th’ look inventive by comparison, that’s sad. 

They say Truth is stranger than Fiction.  In this case, it’s just as dull.

“Based On Actual Events”, so I guess there’s a big dumb fat guy in jail somewhere getting a royalty check from this.

Worthless tripe…everything ‘Land of the Dead’ is not and what ignorant morons would prefer it to be.

To complain more, there are periods where it lags…but there are also some extremely interesting scenes and a few surpriiiiiiiiises.

Inspirational Quote: “Put that hand on me again you won’t get it back”

Evil IQ: “You don’t HAVE to understand…*I* understand…”

The idea(s?) is smart and twisted enough, but too often it plods along and hammers home things that could better be delivered in a different way…after all, Insinuation really makes it happen.

Peter Stormare is a genuine weirdo, a la ‘8MM’, but most of the other characters are as featureless and bland as the lead is intended to be a symbol of…they should all be wearing masks.

Still, it has a certain style about it that makes it at least…well, mildly interesting.

Parts of it are fascinating and parts of it are hokey.  Denzel Washington, as always, is brilliant.

Inspirational Quote: “You know why?  Because cigarettes kill…”

Second, a completely forbidden and impossible love story made only that much more compelling by the inevitable tragic ending to it.

Third, a movie about a witness to murder and about police corruption.

In that order of importance and relevance.

Kelly McGillis glides easily from pure joy to sheer terror in the blink of an eye, as she is both totally fascinated with and totally repelled by Harrison Ford’s outsider and everything he represents.

It’s a bit of a disappointment that this was the best they could come up with to showcase the first two elements, as the third element is a bit dull and completely irrelevant to what anyone watching the movie is CARING about, assuming you’ve ever in your life wanted something you knew you couldn’t have.

Really, it’s a great film…but it’s so remarkably dark and relentlessly hopeless that there’s no point in watching it unless you revel in those feelings…and I don’t.

Recommended to masochists and as a gift for people you don’t like very much.

Inspirational Quote: “Do you ever feel Evil?”

Grade: A-

5/27/12: I simply refuse to call this a “must-see”.  Nyah!  Grade: B+