Category: I Am Puppy Hear Me Degrade

Deep Puppy Thoughts (Part 262 – Hackers)

Since I have my glorified blog backed up in several remote locations, you’d actually be doing me a favor (monetarily) by succeeding in destroying this site.

I mean…I’d just have to get a new hobby.

*shrug* You’re not doing very well, anyways.

Everything here is somewhere(s) remote, so have at it.

I just like taunting you.

– Puppy

Deep Puppy Thoughts (Part 258 – Humanity)

So the vast majority of people are greedy, selfish, insensitive a$$holes who act according to their own best interests.

And when this happens to coincide with acting good to someone else, that’s not really being “a good person”…it’s doing what makes you feel good.

If you happen to – for whatever reason, including simply just BEING BORN THAT WAY – gain enjoyment from being an incredibly nice person, you’re not any better than those that happen to – for whatever reason, including simply just BEING BORN THAT WAY – gain enjoyment in the inflicting of suffering upon others.

What matters, when it comes down to it, is what you truly believe…and what you do, REGARDLESS of how you feel.

If you believe in being Good not because it makes you feel good – though it does – but because you BELIEVE in it, and you BEHAVE that way, that’s truly Good.
And good for you.
If you believe in being Good despite how you feel – good or horrible, or anything in between – and you BEHAVE that way, that’s truly Good.
And, in a way, even more admirable and deserving of happiness.
And good for you.

If you don’t believe in sh1t, on the other hand…well, if you don’t believe in sh1t, but merely act “Good” in order to obtain desired reactions for yourself, then you’re not “bad”…but you’re not really “Good”…you’re a greedy, selfish, insensitive a$$hole.

And of course there are those that don’t believe in sh1t AND ACT THAT WAY…hideous monstrosities that delight in doing wrong. I’ve known SO, SO many of them.

It takes me by surprise when I meet a truly GOOD person…they’re very hard to find.

Please…BE ONE. And if you find another, treasure and appreciate them.

– Puppy

Westborough Behavioral Healthcare Hospital

I’d like to state, first of all, that I am NOT a professional critic. I am, however, an amateur critic with opinions *acting* as one.

I’d like to suggest a new slogan:

“Think your life is a waking nightmare? Well, come here, and we’ll show you what that REALLY is!”

On a scale of 0 to 10, I give it a .1 (Good food, yum yum).

*SATIRE…SATIRE…SATIRE*

– Puppy

To Those Who Said My Site Would Be A Total Failure

To all those who said/thought my online radio station would fail miserably, before it potentially goes away (quit, not fired), here’s my failure:

You have 555,486 Total Visits (As of 4/11/13)

So, probably a bit more including the several years since.

There’s something extremely fulfilling about not just succeeding, but about GRINDING THE FACES of naysayers into the ground about it. Ahhhhhhhh…what a feeling.

Oh, and…

Semper Puppy Radio (First Iteration):

24 Overall Favorite Station selections
1 VIP Favorite Station selection
602 Presets
3465 listening hours in the last 30 days
Rating: 5 out of 5 (4 Votes)
95 Facebook likes
5 Google shares
2 Tweets
1 Pinit

But WAIT, there’s MORE!

“Semper Puppy helps me get through my 12hr shift at work.”

Semper Puppy station peak (first iteration) – 383rd (Out of over 7,000 I believe).
(Last top ten list, by country, last 30 days for first Semper Puppy iteration)

1 – The United States
2 – Mexico
3 – Brazil
4 – Canada
5 – Argentina
6 – The United Kingdom
7 – Germany
8 – Spain
9 – Serbia
10 – Italy

(Last top ten list, by country, last 30 days for second Semper Puppy iteration)

1 – The United States
2 – Germany
3 – Canada
4 – Mexico
5 – The United Kingdom
6 – Brazil
7 – Israel
8 – Ireland
9 – Switzerland
10 – Portugal

(Last top ten list, by state, last 30 days for second Semper Puppy iteration)

1 – IL
2 – CT
3 – FL
4 – CO
5 – OH
6 – TX
7 – CA
8 – NJ
9 – NC
10 – NY

Semper Puppy, second iteration:
All-Time Highs:

Grunge: 1st
Classic Alternative: 10th
Adult Album Alternative: 16th
Overall: 490th

Semper Puppy, third iteration:
All-Time Highs:

Grunge: 1st
Classic Alternative: 7th
Indie Rock: 14th
Overall: 507th

Semper Puppy, fourth iteration:
All-Time Highs:

Grunge: 1st
Classic Alternative: 7th
Indie Rock: 14th
Overall: 464th

Unique Countries, Last 30 Days, fourth iteration: 47 (Record: 50 on 3/13/17)

Yip! >.<

Deep Puppy Thoughts (Part 250)

A collection. And remember, there’s always hope, so hang the fck in there.

“I am become Puppy, licker of faces.”

“In the silent privacy of his mind…she faced…and took his burdens upon herself.
He could not resist her…he had no defense…
“No Evil!” she breathed at him. Not this time.
His eyes were fixed on hers, and they flamed hot midnight…
His refusal made grief well up in her like the wail of a lost child.”
At least I can feel this. More than most, certainly.

Yes, how horrible, the “Friend Zone”.
I mean, it’s just friends.
It’s not corrupted by all those desires, wishes, dreams, love, eternal love. Because what says love like really really loud grunts.
Golly, I really am lucky. (That’s not a joke).
I might think differently if I thought most people were actually genuinely nice and caring.
It’s all just BS leading up to sex. Meaningless.
But if that’s all you want, the brief climax, don’t worry. There are plenty of fellows out there.
“Do you like it? These things you do?”
“No, I don’t. But that’s life, isn’t it?”

FAIR USE: CRITICISM –
“The Thunderous Sound Of Delicacy”
It’s probably already been done, but Duvall’s quiet, gentle, comforting tone and message at the beginning draws you in with an implied sense of civility. Then Duvall pulls a ‘Columbo’. Right before you can leave, he asks a very simple “When?”
You thought “Hey, that wasn’t so bad”…then he comforts some more, before turning it into a soft, gentle, mildly firm like a scold, which rises quickly into a dangerous, helpful, run through, which ends with what terrifies with tone and finally asks (in my opinion) “Do you like your job, son?”
“Because that would be *my* time, my own private time, which no one – if they had any sense of self-preservation at ALL – would dare interrupt.”
*Genial little chuckle*
Gently “If…I were you.”
*Genial little smile*
*The other, fear in his whole figure, freezes, pleading: “I’m sorry…”
Duvall raises his hand, with a low “shhhh”, and proceeds to ignore the man completely, 99 percent sure he will have nothing further useful to say, and he’s gotten bored already in his mocking “explanation”.

FAIR USE: CRITICISM – The person and the bee.

FAIR USE: CRITICISM – The beauty to me is how pure her love is. It seems so rare in people. And as for him, it was tense when I first saw this, a very long time ago…I was actively worried, and then relieved. I cared for them, I genuinely did…suspending disbelief wasn’t a big problem. They couldn’t have pulled this off so seemingly easily if there wasn’t some Diane in Shelley Long, and some Sam in Ted Danson.

“Even though his joints creaked and his bark rasped, he would fight with the fire of a much younger dog if Dru needed him to.”

“Eli: It doesn’t have to make sense. It’s faith, it’s faith. It’s the flower of light in the field of darkness that’s giving me the strength to carry on. You understand?
Solara: Is that from your book?
Eli: No, it’s, uh, Johnny Cash, Live at Folsom Prison.”

“While it’s well known that as one gets older, one tends to find changes in the world at large unsettling, confusing, f@cking irritating, a rebuke to one’s very existence, it’s generally not a good idea to make a career out of saying so.” – Greil Marcus

“Sun Tzu’s ‘The Art Of War’ is to Yamamoto Tsunetomo’s ‘Hagakure’ what a refreshing, crystal-clear, shallow wading pool is to an ocean.” – Me

FAIR USE: CRITICISM –
“…so careful, when I’m in your arms…”
“You woke up screamin’ aloud…”

FAIR USE: CRITICISM –
Beautiful.
“Abashed the Devil stood, and felt how aw(e)ful Goodness is…”

“You deceived me.”
“You let yourself be deceived. But in your heart you always knew what had to happen here.”

“My…dark destructive tastes…
I chose…to stroll amongst the waste that was your heart…lost in the dark…”

The Human League

Greatest Hits (1988)

You can’t get much more meaningless than this. So “Human” is kinda funny, kinda nostalgic, and stupid.

Mechanical (hooks) World. Almost all aren’t hooky enough to warrant listening to the guy’s voice/meaningless lyrics.

Good for when you want to feel substantial, no matter how insubstantial you are.

For best results, instead of listening to 1-16 once each, listen to 1 sixteen times.
(“Don’t You Want Me”)

Grade: D

The King In Yellow (1895): The Complete Collection (Horrorbabble Audiobook, 2017)

Do you like pretension and open-to-any-interpretation? You’ll love this. No? It is then worthless to you.

Fine, the first four “Volumes” have some connections. Enough to maintain interest. But interest based on hope for something MORE, hope that these building blocks will pay off later. But they don’t. They are just LEFT THERE, as the author moves on to confusing insane writing *WITHOUT* connections.

I would try the first four, just to be sure, but trust me on the next six.

When I consider the year that this was published, it makes a LOT more sense. I mean, very few people probably had a then-current chance to read the work, so I imagine it encouraged clever people to gather together in groups with their majestic rare book and dwell on how all the common schmos had no idea this even existed…a shared, rare secret. But it’s not rare anymore. Anyone that wants to know whether they are sufficiently stoned or not could probably determine that by listening to a bit of this. If it sounded brilliant, “It all makes sense to me now!!!”, then you’re plenty stoned. Or plenty high. *riff riff*

If you have interest in this sort of thing, if you have interest in weirdness, if you have interest in H.P. Lovecraft, if you have interest in weird a$$ sh1t….if you WANT to like this, and KNOW it, and what it means, you may very well listen to EVERY line for any hint of anything it might (eventually) give. Oh well, I can’t stop you.

But don’t underestimate this: If you’re of sound mind and don’t wanna get a little freaked or laugh in wondrous surprise, it’s not for you.

Don’t let anyone tell you there’s anything brilliant to be discovered here, because there’s nothing brilliant being *SAID* here.

It’s brilliant nonsense rambling, and if you discover a meaning for yourself, it’s completely by accident…..you’ll try, of course, that’s only natural. Those that like trying and thinking odd, unbidden images will keep on with it, those that do not will stop pretty d@mn quickly.

I have no idea and don’t care enough to look into it, but does this have ANYTHING to do with King Crimson, the obviously much-later-on prog-rock band?

H.P. Lovecraft supposedly read this (and *LIKED* it, yet!), thus justifying its existence.

“Volume One”: A great moment in the history of insane first-person “narration”…At this point, without reading further, it seems as if the entire volume is meant to be a story written by a lunatic, and while it seems pretty insane, I was expecting (hoping?) for something a bit more “important”. A bit of mythos, in the vein of Cthulhu, to get really weird freaky things going.

“Volume Two”: Less varied and weird (less, still very)…not as “good”(?) as one but don’t even *THINK* about skipping chapters, this is a WORK, of art or cr@p or insanity, in any case a work, and it won’t do to pick-and-choose. A beautiful woman is at the center of this buried amidst the now-usual borderline-insane ramblings that go here, there, and/or everywhere.

“Volume Three”: Interesting musical ramblings and/or musings…(more) impressive insane ramblings.

“Volume Four”: Official ‘King In Yellow’ chapter of the Boston Red Sox! Vague reminders of 3 on occasion…and a vague resolution to the supposed theme that’s not any more or less meaningful as any independent ramblings thus far.

“Volume Five”: The origin of the fabled snipe? Love, birds, endless vistas, other weirda$$ sh1t…adding intermittent French has no effect whatsoever. I mean, you know it doesn’t mean anything more than the rest of the nonsense here. Sounds nicer, though…French is such a pretty language.

“Volume Six”: Repetition and sub-sub-titles…I was very thankful when I realized it was short.

“Volume Seven”: Puss? or Puss?…meh or calming, or both. I don’t remember, already.

“Volume Eight”: Oh God this is starting to make my brain bleed. War is – confusing and boring?

“Volume Nine”: Mocks itself at least once, very welcome and normal…French, American, (ew!) Latin…oh Dear God this whole thing is the worst audiobook I’ve ever listened to. Allow me to quote a hero of mine on something completely different: “For a long time I thought this was the worst rock band in history simply because it was the most pretentious, but sometimes pretensions are (at least partially) earned.”…painting tends to be a somewhat common mention…fish FISH a FISHY requisite t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t…”an ecstasy of trill”, now *that* is a cool description – finally. Crossdressing. A miracle. Lots of Rue…faster, faster…

“Volume Ten”: “Crimson, nor yellow…” Is this more evidence that King Crimson took this cr@p and tried to make it sane? Or did they try to keep it insane and go full-on pretense? Or is there no connection? Or who cares?…art teacher…longggggg smile…intermittent French as it builds to a CLIMAX. (No, not really…)…multitudinous love…greater than normal attention, hoping for and waiting for (but not expecting) an actual, meaningful ending that somehow sums things up in some small way at least. NOPE.

Inspirational Quote: “What?? What about the chicken?”

IQ2: “…(passages) that made (‘The King In Yellow’) such an admirable (audiobook) to fall asleep to.” – A Hero

Grade: C- (Upped three notches for inspiring talented writers)

First Time Watching – Overview

Are you bored and lonely? Looking to watch a movie with someone but also by yourself?

This is a category on Youtube where you can do pretty much that.

The quality varies wildly of course, and you’ll have to go through a lot of different “fellow watchers” before you find a Fav.

It can be enjoyable. Just remember – it’s cool to “watch with someone” at times, and in this case you can stop any time you want, and not have to interact in any way. So it’s good for semi-loners and/or really shy and/or depressed and/or socially awkward people.

BUT…they’re not really your “friends”. So avoid unhealthy obsessions. And keep your money in your pockets.

Word that will sear itself into your brain before too long: “Content”.

– Puppy

Pupdate – 7/27/23

I’m back. As you can tell, I’m super excited. I will of course be adding more content. If you somehow stumbled here and read this, great. Have a look around if you like. Or don’t, I don’t care. It’s really for me. A nice permanent recording. If you like what you see and want to support this website and help me add even more quality content, then…well, don’t do anything, I’m not linked up to any support sites. “But seriously, folks”, if you came here on occasion and if you left a cute little sweet little lovey-dovey comment every now and again (like now…and again), I would actually genuinely appreciate it. You may love me, you may hate me, but I hope you at least find me mildly interesting…with an idol like The Dean Of American Rock Critics, Robert Christgau, this makes a lot of sense. Except that he’s extremely interesting.

– Puppy

Deep Puppy Thoughts (Part 237)

FAIR USE: CRITICISM – This is a troubling movie.

FAIR USE: CRITICISM – This is also a troubling movie.

FAIR USE: CRITICISM – Just, you know, if you find something in music or movies, or in life, that is positive, by all means share it as appropriate with the rest of the world. It helps to express feelings in a non-destructive manner sometimes. No-one is perfect. If you expect, be sure to give.

We all need that harmless release. Believe me, it can help. Sometimes not *shrug* but so what, “at least you tried.”

No Opinion On Lentil Puppy Call Letters

A as in at the same token
B as in ‘The Black Eagle’, the second-best movie ever made…by humans.
C as in “A dreamer of pictures, I run in the night; you see us together, chasing the moonlight…”
D as in “…doorway that I run through in the night.”
E as in Eye SEE
F as in Forklift
G as in Good-Time Charlie
H as in Hamm’s Delicatessen
I as in “I’ve got blisters on my fingers!”
J as in Japo-Scandinavian eal.
K as in 19
L as in Lion-taming hat
M as in Morbid desire to face the end of the world.
N as in “Not The Carpenters too…”
O as in “Our official response will be arriving shortly via the North Pole.”
P as in “Private Joker’s silly and he’s ignorant but he’s got guts, and guts is enough.”
Q as in T
R as in R’lyeh
S as in Snausages
T as in Twenty Thousand Leagues Under The Sea
U as in DOS basics.
V as in Vicious gangs of “Keep Left” signs
W as in “Watch out for snakes.”
X as in Scape
Y as in “You swim like lions through the crest and bathe yourself in zebra flesh.”
Z as in Grade

Deep Puppy Thoughts (Part 234)

“…these dreamsongs are nightmares of a world in flames, the kind you remember in all their scary inconsistency because you woke up sweating in the middle.” – Robert Christgau

With R.C., sometimes the review is more enjoyable and more fun to OCD to than the actual song/track/record/cassette/cd/mp3/beyond-my-comprehension.

In this case, I think “screaming” would be more appropriate, more image-inducing, more interesting. But he’s the best. Was, at least.

I am more and more uncomfortable with my failing relevance to things after “In my day…”

So out of touch that there’s really no point in trying to get current…impossibility takes a lot of pressure off.

So, next generation, you go out there and kick some a$$, metaphorically speaking.

Occidental Puppy Call Letters

A as in A$$ Pennies
B as in BCorruption
C as in Cellar
D as in Door
E as in “The explosion was tremendous, lighting up the night like the wrath of God, and it rained fire twenty blocks away.”
F as in Fancy that
G as in The guy who brings the money
H as in Preparation
I as in “It’s A Good Life”
J as in “Just like an angel, your skin makes me cry…”
K as in Kicking and screaming
L as in Lady fingers
M as in “Mommy, I don’t wanna be in daddy’s movie anymore!”
N as in “Well, the television says that’s the right thing to do…”
O as in I’m getting pretty lazy about these.
P as in “Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn”
Q as in I mean, really…
R as in Returning videotapes
S as in “So careful, when I’m in your arms…”
T as in “Thank you, Centron.”
U as in ray
V as in ray
W as in well-maintained frontage
X as in Oh God not you again.
Y as in “You’re stuck here!”
Z as in Ummm…let’s go with x2 Zebra Flesh. Or whatever. Or who cares?

Stephen King, Please Stop Writing

I’ve put my trust in your name (due to admittedly very good past results) a couple times, and ended up with a couple really sh1tty books.

So, that was that…besides, you’re obsolete.

“Cane’s work scares me.”
“What’s to be scared about? It’s not like it’s “real” or anything.”
“Well, it’s not real from your point of view, and right now reality shares your point of view. What scares me about Cane’s work is what would happen if reality shared his point of view.”
“Whoa whoa whoa, we’re not talking about reality here, we’re talking about fiction, it’s different.”
“A reality is just what we tell each other it is: sane and insane could easily switch places if the insane were to become the majority…you would find yourself locked in a padded cell wondering what happened to the world.”
“Well it wouldn’t happen to me.”
“It would if you realized everything you ever knew was gone…it’d be pretty lonely being the last one left.” – ITMOM

FAIR USE: CRITICISM – Part three in the “Apocalypse Trilogy”, starting with ‘The Thing’, continuing horribly with ‘Prince Of (Flatulence)’, and then, thank God’s Green Flat Earth for ‘In The Mouth Of Madness’.

Deep Puppy Thoughts (Part 229)

Don’t play it down, play it up. Better to be too careful.

I really don’t give a fck about watching Florida, New York, and Seabiscuit trying to win.

Put everything of little or no importance on hold…keeping the necessary of course, but nothing beyond that.

Put all available resources into the problem, solve the problem (however long it takes, will be LESS than how long it would take NOW), and then slowly ease back into pre-pandemic policies. Make the necessary adjustments/repairs.

“Never Give In” (or something very similar): Worked great in WWII, worked great in ‘Galaxy Quest’, and so on.

If you can’t do anything to help (and that’s not a failing at all, given circumstances) then at least remain Neutral.

It’s kind of disgusting to have to say, but unless you’re starving please don’t go around stealing others’ food.

Don’t go around doing petty sh1t under the cover of “social distancing” or (as I JOKINGLY put it a WHILE ago) to take advantage of the chaos, the fear, all the other emotions and circumstances that abound, in order to steal a pack of Twinkies. Show a little basic fcken morality.

FAIR USE: CRITICISM – Good scene from a pretty poor movie. I used to like it, but oh well, at least it was quote-worthy.

Superior Re-View, Aged To Perfection

FAIR USE: CRITICISM – Brilliant how Kubrick can make one slightly-off, portentously creepy piano keystroke (not here) have the same scare value as one of the least-recommended elevators (here). Brilliant how I can come up with a blend of sources and make an incredibly minor influenced work.

I think I genuinely don’t know sometimes now, when my posts/comments are clever or just dumb and difficult to comprehend.

But, all right…I’ll give you some blood.

Incidental Puppy Call Letters

A as in Almost human, but I’ll never be the same…
B as in Beware of Puppy
C as in Cookbook
D as in Dogs Playing Blackjack
E as in Eyebrow tears
F as in Fobody’s Nault
G as in Grue
H as in Human beans
I as in I would have liked to have smelled Montana…
J as in Weigh Station: Lightweight
K as in Knocking blocks off
L as in Lark’s vomit
M as in MUCH better than ‘Cats’
N as in Not kneeing you in the groin is a constant struggle
O as in A vicious cycle
P as in Plenty of lip-and-tongue action
Q as in Slightly malformed O
R as in Rejected
S as in Spiny Norman
T as in Tower Of Iron Will
U as in F
V as in Vulcans never bluff
W as in Wake Up And Smile
X as in X=Con
Y as in Your words have no meaning here
Z as in These are getting harder and harder to do

Let’s Get These Out Of The Way, They’re Nearly Done

ECT, ECT, ECT…
Final prep: Cool breeze for your veins
And the softly-spoken words that send you gently away from what’s to come.

“It’s in those eyes of yours, though” (‘Seven’)
It’s the look in their eyes, Oh God so rare, looking down in bed, meeting their gaze, and seeing wonder, fascination…God I miss that.

LLC

‘Snuff 2: The Resurrection’

“Someone on staff will get you your well deserved virus…”

“Yeah, I know, we have no feelings…no compassion…no empathy for our client’s suffering. Can I say something? What does that have to do with anything? In fact, the lawyer who shares his client’s pain – in my opinion – does his client such a grave disservice, he should have his license to practice law taken away. It clouds his judgement. And that’s as beneficial to his client as a doctor that recoils at the sight of blood.”

A library (an often majestic, beautiful structure with aspects of timelessness) is now, in this grand age, simply a very, very large backup drive. So since we don’t even need those books anymore (everything’s online, right?) would it really be THAT outrageous to suggest that book burnings are better than books sitting on their shelves, because hey, at least on fire they provide a little heat for homeless people.

Supersonic: A creeping riff falling off a cliff. Poor thing.

Unofficial Puppy Call Letters

A as in A Maid On A Night Out Winding A Grandfather’s Clock With Her Left Hand
B as in Bloody gobs
C as in Clever people, like me, who talk loudly in restaurants
D as in Don’t get cocky, kid.
E as in E. Henry…
F as in Floodlights
G as in God’s Green Flat Earth
H as in How long is it?
I as in I can’t take it anymore!
J as in Jersey Cream Psychiatry
K as in Kumbhakarna bunks with Cthulu
L as in L O S T
M as in Mummy alligator
N as in Kicking and screaming
O as in One-Time Fixation
P as in Puppy Haters Association
Q as in Curly
R as in Riding dead people
S as in Smut picture racket
T as in Thripshaw
U as in Uncaring worm
V as in Verse/Chorus/Verse/Chorus/Solo/Verse/Chorus/Solo/Bad Solo
W as in Watch out for snakes
X as in Two Muscular Guys Touching Fingers
Y as in Y.E.T.A.N.O.T.H.E.R. Pratt
Z as in Zoomies

Official Puppy Call Letters

A as in Anacanapuna…
B as in Bouncy-bouncy!
C as in Cheese knife
D as in Dogs Playing Poker
E as in Ewe
F as in You
G as in Big fence in Chicago
H as in Haikiba!
I as in SEE
J as in Ugly late night talk show host
K as in Kwah Kee Ser Pee Nee Ku
L as in Lives of quiet desperation
M as in Mooooooo…
N as in None of your Goddamn business
O as in Ommmmmmm…
P as in Plucking
Q as in Queen of France
R as in Roads Scholar
S as in Suddenly. Pineapples.
T as in Raymond Luxury Yacht
U as in Ugly late night talk show host
V as in Vat
W as in Wainscoting
X as in I hate thinking up words for X
Y as in You’re an a$$hole
Z as in Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia

Is this what my inspiration has come to? Oh well.