Eventually, if humanity survives long enough, people will ask each other:
Do you BELIEVE people actually used to waste their time praying to “God”?
They will also ask each other:
Do you BELIEVE people actually used to waste their time crusading against “God”?
-Puppy >.< Yip!
The great thing about the latest trend of MASSIVE amounts of movie “re-boots” (aka remakes) is that people no longer actually have to come up with those pesky creative things called “ideas”.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
The Only Actor Worse Than Nic Cage:
FK’s Gwain.
Here’s a typical example of his wit, ability, and rule-following:
“Gwain says to A lanky, violet-skinned male air genasi ‘Not the bees. not the bees’
Gwain says to A lanky, violet-skinned male air genasi ‘They’re in my eyes.'”
This is, on a “roleplay-enforced” MUD with lots of help files saying specifically NOT to act OOC, IC…to keep them separate, to stay in character…sad. But hey, that’s typical for him.
In the OOC sense, and in the dumb, unfunny, irrepressibly drab and awful sense.
If you should play the otherwise mostly pleasant and welcoming game known as Forgotten Kingdoms, and happen to run into this…ummm….player?…I think the proper response, in character, to anything he says could very well be this:
Having no parents is better than having sh1tty parents.
To J.C. and L.C., as N.Y. would say it: THAT one’s for YOU…
It’s also, while admittedly NOT ideal, a whole lot better than a wide-awake rat.
And now, on a different note, three quotes:
“Two two two two? What are you doin’, playin’ trains??” – Moe Howard
“Eight two eight two? What are you doin’, eatin’ trains??” – Puppy
“Eight two eight two? Who are you bein’, Julius Caesar??” – Puppy
-Puppy >.< Yip!
And then of course later the NYPD had to take the field in full riot gear to protect the actual PEOPLE from those in the stands throwing sh1t.
Go ahead, bite the Big Apple…don’t mind the maggots.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
As another way to mention the movie ‘Lo’, I think it would make a great name for a beholder.
I believe this review of the unfortunately-ubiquitous character known to me as “Git Without An Interesting Name” sums up why Forgotten Kingdoms has fallen from 4th to 9th in a recent “Top Ten MUDs” list:
(See clip from ‘The F List – Movies’)
And the award for “Least Deserving Academy Award In The History Of The Universe Already” goes to:
Marisa Tomei for ‘My Cousin Vinny’.
Vanilla Whore did a better job in ‘Scott Of The Antarctic’.
Ok, so if you’re attacked by a zombie and it rips one of your arms off, admittedly that’s not good. But you can do one of two things: You can be a Debby Downer and think “Oh, no…I just lost one of my arms to a zombie attack, and it didn’t even beat me to death with it”…OR, you can think positively. I mean, it’s up to YOU to decide whether your arm sockets are half empty or half full.
This should get you in the spooky mood, courtesy Tim Burton’s Siamese twin:
Ruff!
10/16/16: FAIR USE: CRITICISM – Well, as far as opening titles go, I guess these are pretty dang good! Also, signature removed. (housekeeping)
Another example of Eric Idle’s propensity for giving blood:
2:45-4:12
Oh No!
Now I’ll have to go to England! Or Scotland! Or Ireland. Or France, Germany, Italy, Japan, India, Brazil, Oklahoma, SOUTH Korea, Western Africa…
I mean, come on. That guy is such a huge dork that it’s hard to take his nasty (and very real) evil-ness seriously.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
So on my online radio station, there’s an ad (which I fully support despite the joke coming) in which people talk about giving blood to help save lives, and how important it is. And all through it I’m having this naughty tingle in the back of my head, and then at the end when the guy says very emotionally and seriously – “Save Lives…Give Blood”, I can’t help thinking “Yeah, that’s cool…but it would be so much cooler if, right after that guy’s plea, they inserted Eric Idle from the ‘Blood/Urine Bank’ sketch of MPFC saying “Alright…I’ll give you some blood.”
I’m not going to give the name, because that would just give them publicity, BUT:
If you ever find yourself on a MUX, or MUD, or MUSH, or any other den of supposed roleplaying, and you make a character who is a good-natured and pleasant but naive virgin, and another character forces her to masturbate so hard that she bleeds profusely, and she is upset by that and complains, and you (as player, and character) are accused of behaving “neither fair nor proportional”, and a/the Imm then suggests maybe this isn’t the place for you…agree.
Rex didn’t guarantee a Super Bowl win this year, BUT he did say the Jets would be:
“…far from an embarrassment when the season’s over…” (the extra r is for his name, I think).
I think he’s learned to correctly tone down.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
Dear Rex:
Thank you for imparting your classy personality onto your team.
That’s what happens when the coach lets the players run the team…
It wasn’t Alosi-esque, but still.
Now I’m gonna go on a f@cken diet!!!
-Puppy >.< Yip!
“Cassell will lead the flashy new Vikings over the old rusted out Patriots.” – Some sports posting person
I think the term “reactionary nonsense” should be applied more liberally to sports. I mean, some of us fans can think.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
Crusading Antitheism is the default “cause” for angry pseudo-intellectuals who don’t care enough to devote time and energy to a real cause.
‘Patriots Favored Again, But The Gap May Be Closing’
They’ve been saying that for a decade.
If you say it enough times, eventually it HAS to come true.
It’s called the law of averages.
Sad.
If you’re gonna make a prediction, make a real one.
I mean, the universe MAY end tomorrow.
Not bloody likely, but it MIGHT.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a0X1ynq1x8M
I can almost imagine D. Noctem thinking along the lines of D. Velvet, who also didn’t get a beautiful death:
“This is…wrong…I’m supposed to have something, more cinematic…”
11/5/16: FAIR USE: CRITICISM – Really good song by a dead band. It actually gets better the more you listen to it; at first it’s secondary to “If Only I Could”, then it’s about as good, then it’s clearly superior. Also, update: signature removed.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FqF0T8pSStM
10/16/16: Clip removed. Your guess is not as good as mine. (housekeeping)
If it hasn’t been done yet:
Walken’s “cowbell” sketch put to lyrics and set to the music of Kid Rock’s song “Cowboy”.
That’s a good one. Go on, take it, it’s yours.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
Inspired by my imminent viewing of a cr@ppy zombie flick, I’ve decided to write the following magnificent piece of festering:
‘The Zombie’s Diary’
By Puppy
Chapter One
aaaahhhhhhhh…
Chapter Two
aaaAAHHH!
Chapter Three
Braiiiiins…
Chapter Four
More brains!
Chapter Five
aaaahhhhhhhh…
Chapter Six
*gunshot*
Chapter Seven
*thud*
End
-Puppy >.< Yip!
Yes, I’m still sane.
They should make a movie – or write a book – that’s a Lovecraft-ian take on zombies called ‘In The Mouth Of Zombies’.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
Non-cops charged with this: fired and tossed in cell.
Cops charged with this: paid administrative leave.
http://www.aol.com/article/2014/08/06/married-police-officers-arrested-in-fatal-shooting/20943114/?icid=maing-grid7|main5|dl6|sec1_lnk2%26pLid%3D511960
Included mainly for slideshow 1 + 2…warning: graphic nature.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/08/05/6-year-old-pepper-spray_n_5652119.html
To the tune of Alannah Myles’ “Love Is”:
“Carnivore’s Ode To A Cow” – By Puppy
Two lines from it:
“Tell me…where you want me to chew,
Cuz flesh iiIS…what I want from YOU-Ou-Ou…”
And there’s gotta be a moo rhyme in there somewhere.
And so on, and so on…
4/14/16: WTF is wrong with me??? I forgot “Cud is…”!!!
Having had the number one grunge station on this site for a LONG time before abandoning it due to the problem described below, and having (NOW) the number three grunge station (and climbing as I’ve just started it) on this site, I think I’m qualified to review an annoying aspect of this site that I’m sure all non “Premium” (i.e. “Gimme Some Money”) listeners can appreciate.
There are ads on the top. On the side. On the bottom.
Fine. No problem. They havta make money.
Then there are the video ads, with audio as loud as or louder than the song you’re listening to.
Not fine. Bullsh1t. They start without – to my knowledge – any way to prevent them and completely destroy the experience of listening to the song you’re listening to. Can they be dealt with, such as stopping them or lowering the volume EVERY SINGLE TIME they load independently? Perhaps. But it’s still bullsh1t.
Maybe that’s why you can no longer say “Over 7000 stations”.
Now it’s “Over 5000”. And it’s less than 6.
Try getting rid of the obnoxious greedy sh1t. That’s marketing advice, and a review.
Fair Use: Criticism – Two parts of particular interest and feeling.
(In Clip 2)
I hate traffic accidents as much as that little girl from that Gamera movie, but even I have to admit that without them we’d probably all be snatched away by now.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FqF0T8pSStM
Fair Use, Criticism: One of the best scenes from ‘Braveheart’.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
Fact: I am pro-choice.
Now…
I’ve seen a sign twice, maybe it was the same deluded (or wanna-be-deluDING) woman both times, at rallies concerning abortion rights.
The sign says “Women For Religious Freedom”.
Which is a load of propagandic sh1t.
Plenty of Theists are pro-choice.
Plenty of Atheists are pro-life.
Those are facts.
To insinuate, quite blatantly, that atheism = pro-choice is absurd and misleading at best, an outright propagandic agenda at worst.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
Someone MUST have thought of this by now, but if they haven’t:
Slogan proposal:
‘Devil Springs: INFERNAL’
The infernal would be all flamey and stuff of course.
“A satirist is someone who has a very skeptical view of human nature, but who still has the optimism to make some sort of a joke out of it. However brutal that joke might be.” – Stanley Kubrick
My pre-emptive two word review for ‘Raging Bull’ if it’s as bad as ‘Taxi Driver’:
Tranquil Cow.
Not as good as the serial killer questions, but still pretty sad:
Q: “Are you attracted to dangerous situations?”
A: No
Optional Explanation: To the “yes” people…really? Then why aren’t you in one?
Bri said: 3/14/2012 12:59:02 AM (GMT)
Awesome site! I love the puppy and LOLcat pictures! Your reviews are very useful! Just wanted to say hi!
stacy said: 9/12/2011 11:05:37 PM (GMT)
nice work, lets do this! :) Stacy
Puppy said: 1/15/2011 2:12:35 AM (GMT)
If Puppy’s favorite Pixies song = “Rock Music”, and Puppy = Great, then “Rock Music” = Great. Yay! :)
Bunny said: 11/11/2010 5:42:14 AM (GMT)
You Rock!
God said: 10/17/2010 3:29:05 AM (GMT)
You sir, are going to Hell.
Ok, so there’s this movie ‘Jersey Boys’, about a pretty good pop group from the 60’s.
Why?
I mean, it must be for the uniqueness. Only about 10,000 other groups have ever made it to the big stage after people didn’t think they would.
And they weren’t even all THAT popular. I mean…The Beatles, The Doors, Pink Floyd, Led Zep…I could understand all of those. But The Four Seasons??? Wow…talk about lowering the bar.
My favorite part of the gripping ad for it is Chris Walken telling the singer “wait til people hear your voice”…or something similar. They’re not important enough to verify the quote.
I’d rather have him with sunglasses on telling them they had, what seems to him to be, a DYNAMITE sound. Cuz coming from him, that would mean a lot.
In 30-40 years, will we see Chris (if he’s still alive) riding in a limo with an actor playing Peter Steele? “I tell ya, Peter – you’re gonna wanna keep that VAMPIRE voice, in the songs…”
So relatively inconsequential to contemporaries it’s laughable; my example, and this movie.
And don’t give me the “hugely popular” and “one of the highest-selling…” cr@p reasons. They weren’t as popular, nor did they sell as many records, as ABBA. And I don’t think we need a movie about A B B and A. Please…don’t.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
Vis:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CyENheI2vEQ
10/16/16: FAIR USE: CRITICISM – Good clip from a great movie. (housekeeping)
Pending some unforeseen actual help from GD in transferring my blog without getting carpal tunnel syndrome, this blog will disappear on 6/25/14.
Oh, I’ll have all the posts…but they won’t be here.
Doesn’t help you much, does it?
Basically on the 25th this blog will vanish and I will cancel all GD products.
Have fun! And F GD.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
6/19/14: Pupdate – I will risk carpal tunnel syndrome. Oh, the Humanity.
My website, dapuppy.com, has over 2200 posts made over almost a four year period. I just discovered that GoDaddy plans on cancelling my current blog format. I was told by a phone rep that the best I could do, even switching to the new blog format, was to “start from scratch”. I honestly don’t know how to express how I feel about this. Everything I worked on for four years is going to be just wiped out, and there’s nothing I can do about it? Could I get some sort of reasonable explanation for this? Is anyone else outraged by this?
6/19/14: Explanation received, as well as solution. I’m still a bit upset that I didn’t receive a notice that I was told was sent out several months ago, but oh well. Life goes on…here to stay.
Excerpt from a recent discussion (not about religion…it doesn’t matter what it’s ABOUT, you see):
“…Here I thought it was because of hundreds of thousands of years of evolution driving men to sow their seed with as many partners as possible and women to be as picky as possible during the same age period. I never could have guessed that physiology would lie to me. Thank you for opening my eyes…”
Now, I don’t KNOW this…but I’d say I’m a solid 6.2534422 that this person is a CA/A.
Why? Because, even while educating, they can’t resist being an insulting, snide a$$hole.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
“‘Two two two two’? What do you think you’re doin’, playin’ trains?”
(linkdead…Frenchmen explaining flying sheep)
1:06-1:13: The moment(s) of inspiration
The inspiration is then transferred to conception, and upon completion appears as:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5wESgWiDVBE
Explained simply as follows:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vhc1hWXH5IM (3:47-4:51)
Really…interesting.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
10/16/16: FAIR USE: CRITICISM – Good clips from a great show (housekeeping)
There’s an ad for a car where the only selling point of it is basically “you can get a little optional mini vacuum with this”.
That’s about as important as Ron Burgundy’s car commercial talking about the wonderful glove compartment.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VxWAFOVrYKA
10/16/16: Link Disabled. Apparently Ron Burgundy does not like to share. (housekeeping)
1st Iteration – He’ll what?
2nd Iteration – Why??
*shrug* A hell of a lot better than that “Roykirk” sh1t, and I’m just a measly human.
-Puppy >.< Yip!
“Jesus, I mean, you (guys) do nothin’ but complain about how you can’t stand (it in this place here) and then you haven’t got the guts just to (walk out!?)”
‘Teacher Fired After Asking 4th Graders For Dating Advice’ – Title of recent online article
And she’s appealing. She’s also an “actress”, supposedly, I think…sad.
Great PR move. Maybe you’ll actually be in a movie soon.
Her cinematography clock is definitely ticking. Of course if it was a male plenty of people would be screaming bloody murder. But it’s a female, so it’s sort of “laughably naughty but no harm done” to a lot of those same people. I mean, come on…sexism goes both ways.
You know…”equality” contains the word “equal”.
The sign for equal is… =
1=1. 1+1=2.
Simple math…you CAN’T GET more basic. So how do
crusading, science-worshipping Dawkian “intellectuals” miss this?
-Puppy >.< Yip!
Recent Headline: ‘Malnourished 10-year-old boy rescued from Ontario home’
Personally, I think it’d be even scarier to imagine – and relieving to know it’s over – if the first and last words were removed.
